This weekend I was a human garbage can. I ate anything and everything in sight and most of the food was not healthy. I realized that my natural state is to eat junk. I love junk food. I love sugar. I love fries. Mmmm fries… That is one of the reasons I exercise so much. The problem is, my body doesn’t react so well. It doesn’t make me feel good. In fact, it makes me feel like crap.

I remember being at the kitchen table when I was a kid, LONG after the rest of the family was excused. I had to eat my vegetables. I hated them. I still do, except for maybe salad and raw veggies. Cooked veggies are bearable only with something on them. I know they are good for me, so I eat them… but I don’t LIKE them. This is something I want to change.

Change is hard. Eating healthy is hard. It takes preparation and organization and when you live a busy life, it must be one of your top priorities. There have been times in my life when I ate REALLY healthy, but usually with a weight loss goal in mind. Now, I am at a crossroad. I don’t want to lose weight. I want to maintain my current weight. In one of my first posts I talked about my “deprivation” mode vs. my “reward” mode. I usually fluctuate between depriving myself and losing weight and rewarding myself and gaining it back. I can tell right now, that my body is trying to go into the “reward” cycle… but this time, something has changed. I do not want to go back. I want to break the cycle. Change.

When I am eating healthy I have more energy. I feel better. When I eat like crap, I feel like crap. Change can only occur in small doses. Just like weight loss. If you lose too much weight, too fast, your body will eventually fight you back. Eating healthy doesn’t come easily to me. I have used food (junk food) as a reward for my whole life.

What if I ate healthy 90% of the time? Here is my solution:

Eat 3 small meals a day, with 3 healthy snacks. Do not miss a meal/snack or replace a meal/snack with coffee. Limit refined sugar (i.e. candy, cookies, ice cream) and processed food. Always have healthy snacks on hand to eat when hungry. Eat lots of veggies. Drink lots of water. As a reward, schedule in 2 cheat meals a week, where I can eat ANYTHING and AS MUCH as I want. Once the cheat meal is done, go back to healthy eating. The most important thing in this plan is not to try to lose weight, or deprive myself. Eating healthy doesn’t mean depriving myself. It is hard for me to eat healthy without the goal of losing weight. This I need to change. Break the cycle. I have worked so hard to get where I am. I will not go back. Not this time. Body? Do you hear me?